My dad is not famous, not rich, not extraordinary, but one thing sets him apart from everyone else: He is my first Hero.

No he is not a Super dad, like what others think of their dads. In fact, he is unique, he is not normal, he is supra normal as what he used to say.

He is schizophrenic as his doctors diagnose him. But I know he is fighting, everyday he is fighting a sickness only a few can overcome, fighting something we all have little control over: neurotransmitters. Who cares about those damned neurotransmitters anyway? Most of us don't, but these trivial things changed his life forever.

I have few fond memories of my father. Most of the hurtful ones, I simply want to forget, while the happy moments, I want to cherish forever. Among my siblings, since I was the eldest, I was the one who have more memories of my father before he got sick.

So who's my dad? He is John Rosales Balili. To his workmates, he was John, his relatives called him Tito Jean, his students called him Sir John and to me and my siblings he is Papa.

He was a good man. As a son, he was never the type to help work in the fields but he likes to stay at home and only knows how to cook rice. He tries to please his parents by excelling at school. As a brother, he was thoughtful and generous. As a teacher, he was very dedicated and passionate, he was not only known for being a walking computer but he was also remembered for his kindness and for their friendship.

I know not much about how he truly was to other people. But to me and my siblings, he is a good father.

As a father, he was a good provider. Before he got sick, he was the one providing for all our needs, working from dusk until dawn, even taking tutorial jobs at night so he can have more money to spend for our growing family.

He was our play mate as well. Even in his busy schedule he makes way to spend time with us, even just by strolling in our village and taking unlimited photos of us, or by going to the nearby river and take a bath at the stream together with the carabaos or a bunch on tadpoles. I also remember playing games with him such as scrabble, chess, snakes and ladders, word cube, monopoly and even playing cards. I feel so happy when I beat him, making feel like a genius too. He makes sure that we have a balance of work and play.

Despite his scholarly achievements, he never pressured us to become academic achievers. Instead, he emphasized the value of play in learning. He said if only he could turn back time he would play more and not focus on getting good grades, because you only get to be a child once.

He also taught us the value of reading. Every time he drops by the book sale shop, he will buy me a Hardy Boys or Nancy Drew book. He even encouraged me to read classic books such as The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, Gulliver travels, and the like. The Little Prince was my favorite. He wanted us to develop a habit of reading. Maybe I just did not develop his great memorizing skills, but yes I learned to love reading.

He taught me to love music as well. He taught me how to sing and even had our own recording sessions. I remember hearing our recorded voices (my voice was still that of a toddler) singing nursery rhymes. He also taught me how to play the guitar, actually he just taught me how to read the chords because he trusts that I can learn on my own. He even bought me my first guitar on my twelfth birthday when he saw how eager I was to make my own music.

He also taught us how to swim. During weekends, we have our swimming sessions at the river near our house, together with some of our friends. When we were a little older, he would bring us to a nearby club house or Grotto Vista during summer to swim. But swimming in the river together with the carabaos were the best swimming lessons we had.

He influenced me to love crafting. Apart from his love for computers and photography, he also likes DIY Carpentry. He was the one to craft the bookshelves at home as well as some cabinets. He also makes invitation cards from scratch and creates his own rubber stamps to design then when a desk top printer was not yet invented. In fact, my mom still keeps all of the cards and love letters he gave her. He was also very good in calligraphy.

He also loved poetry. When I was young he would read to us a book full of poems that he created. He also keeps a little book full of love poems for Mama. He influenced me not only to make poems but to make songs out of it as well.

He was a big influence in my life and played a big role on what I have become today.

The time when Papa got sick, I was still eight then, was like experiencing a lost battle for the first time. It was devastating. Life changed 360 degrees. At our age that time, we do not really understand. All I wanted at that time was for my Papa to come back. I missed his happy face and I missed his joyful spirit. Years passed and his sickness got worse. If I base it on research, I can blame it on his electric shock therapy, but maybe it was also God's plan.

My Papa is now 65 years old, for more than 20 years he was suffering from mental illness. He is old now and even if in my heart I wish we can bring back the young and vibrant father I used to know, it may never happen now. For now, I don't pray to bring back the past, yet I pray that he will have more years to enjoy life. Yes, all I want for him now is to enjoy life, explore the world while he still can if God permits.

Yes Papa is not ordinary. Indeed he is supranatural as he claims to be. His love is genuine and he keeps on fighting his battle each day. Despite his weaknesses and his lapses he will forever be a great father to me. I admire him for his love for my mother and for us, I think that is what keeps him fighting his illness. He may not be a super dad but to me my father is my first hero, my Super hero.

 

Amidst all the hype in Social Media thanking mothers during Mother's Day, I would like to say that I am more grateful that God gave me the opportunity to become a mom. Motherhood is a gift from God, one of the greatest a woman could ever have.

I am grateful that my kids thank me for the things I do for them. That is only one of the perks of being a mother. But they don't actually need to thank me, that is my job, like I signed a contract when I decided to carry them in my womb for nine months (Genesis 3:16) and rear them to become a good person until they are able to live a life of their own. 

I am still a newbie mom, despite being a mother of two, my eldest being only 5 years old. Yet those five years have been the most fruitful years of my life.

Motherhood taught me a lot of things I have never learned when I still did not have children of my own. Motherhood opened the doors to a lot of emotions I never thought I would feel. Motherhood changed my perspective in life. Motherhood brought out the best in me.

Patience

Guiding my child as she learns how to walk, she faltered several times but I was patient enough to guide her.

Or when she(my youngest) was playing with her poop and spreading it all over the floor, I gathered all the patience I had to clean her and the house and not to get mad.

Or when during our bonding time, she(my eldest) asks about the same thing over and over again, wanting me to give her the answers she wants to hear. Answering the who, when, what, where and whys, takes a lot of patience.

They also taught me to learn to wait for my turn. Since I have two children, they have to take turns when playing with their toys or when using the bathroom. But for me, these instances made me learn how to wait for God's time. I have lots of aspirations in life I can give all my best to achieve it, but I have to wait until God says it's my time.

Courage

When you have children, you can conquer your deepest fears. 

I have to display courage so they can have courage. 

Like being courageous when surrounded with things or people I am afraid of. Or simply by speaking out my mind without being shy or hesitant. These teach my children to have courage.

 

Humility

Saying sorry depicts humility. There are times when I say something wrong or commit a mistake, but admitting my fault to them shows humility that they can emulate. And saying sorry even when I was not at fault shows great humility.

Following the rules even when I don't agree to it. Or by respecting other people's opinion without being rude when contradicting them.

Sharing what I have even when I only have few of my stuff is being humble.

I also learned to give credit to others especially to God for my accomplishments or for whatever possession I have because He gave me everything I have.

 

Gratefulness

Teaching them how to say thank you even for trivial things. I also learned how to be grateful with the little things I have.  

I learned to be grateful for each moment I spend with my family. Thankful for all the blessings I received be it big or small.

Before I thought that there are things that i am entitled to because I earned it. But it's simply not that way, everything comes from the Lord, and because of my sins I am only entitled to death, but with God's grace I am able to cherish the life that I have now. So whatever I have, be it big or small, anything that is bestowed to me by the Lord, I am grateful.

Forgiveness

I learned to forgive big and small faults. Many times my children hurt me, physically, but unintentionally. And those trite moments they hurt me, I learned to forgive.

Many times they also hurt each other, but it is just amazing how children can easily forgive each other. This taught me how to forgive others who also hurt me big time.

Persistence

Have you watched a kid doing the same task over and over again, trying so many times, just so he or she can achieve what they want? Like a child trying to climb over their crib, so they can finally escape their mini cage.

Children are persistent. This taught me how to try and try even if I fail many times.

At first try, we may not get what we want, just like in business or in our work. But we have to be persistent, because great things take time.

Creativeness

Many times people buy my children toys but then they only play with it for a short a while because all they really want to play with are my pots and pans and the sand and plain paper where they draw and paint. They make their own toys too, with recycled boxes and old clothes and socks.

This sparkled the creativity in me too. I was able to make use of the things around the house and made them purposeful, thus saving me money and providing lots of creative 'me' time.

It also allowed me to make ideas into creations.

Thoughtfulness

I used to be selfish and thought only about myself. But having children made me think of them most of the time. I learned to think of their need first instead of mine. I learned to think a step ahead when it comes to what they need.

I learned to be thoughtful not only for my children, but to people who matter the most to me.

Trust

I used to have an issue with trust. Many times people have hurt me and broken my trust. But one incident of my child being bullied by her best friend reminded me again about trusting other people.

I used to mistrust other people because I wanted to protect myself from being hurt again. From trusting again and being betrayed afterwards.

But dealing with people requires trust, whether they fail us or not is part of it. But not all people are the same, there are people who are good and genuine. Not trusting people hurt my relationship with others. Trusting them will create a bridge towards the gap I created between them and me. And hopefully will enable me to relate to them better.

Selflessness

As I said earlier, I used to be selfish. I used to be success driven, materialistic and full of myself. But having children, taught me to become selfless.

My children taught me that life is not all about me, about what I can get, but what I can give.

They taught me to live for others. Because that is what makes life meaningful.

Love

Storge, the kind of love of a parent to a child. It may not be "Agape" or Godly love, because I am only human and I am naturally sinful. But I learned to love my children as a parent loves their child.

I don't believe that loving your children is an instinct, because if it is, then there wouldn't be mothers choosing abortion. But it is a choice, and one of the greatest choices in life that I have made. 

I learned how it is to truly love when I married my husband, but I learned that I can have more love to give when I had my own children.

Yes, mothers are truly a blessing to the world but being a mother is a greater blessing. Only few are chosen to become mothers. And only a few are really able to live up to the Godly role of being a mother.

To all the mothers, mother-to-be, foster mothers, once a mother, whoever you are, let's thank God for the blessing of motherhood. Cheers!

I am writing this a few months before me and my husband celebrate our fifth year as husband and wife. As a Christian, I base most of what I do according to what is written in the Bible (2 Timothy 3:16-17), as is it said that it will guide us in everything that we do.

I have only been born again a few years back and I must say that most of what I know about my functions as a wife and a mother has been influenced by what the society tells us. In this day and age, women are empowered and liberated as opposed to women in the past where women are the minority. But as a child of God, we have to know what God tells us about the function of a woman in the household.

I am a lover of reading. Reading online and offline materials is an everyday task for me. And this habit of reading is something that I want to instill in my children early on. So I make it a habit to buy books every week so that my eldest child who is four as of this writing will have a new book to read each week.

So I like to explore book shops especially the Book Sale shop in KCC for cheap books. Here are some of the books I bought for about 20 to 35 pesos each.